It’s important to recognize that while we invest everything in helping our children stand on their own two feet, after a while, we need to let them go and become their own people. That’s not to say that we cannot help them leave the nest with the strongest wings so they can take their safest flight.
Of course, it’s worth considering to what degree you’re willing and able to invest in making things easier for them. It might be that taking all challenges from them at this vital juncture could prevent them from learning independence, especially if they can always rely on you for more money or for you to do their laundry, just to bring up a few examples.
Giving your child every chance of success, then, means helping them think independently and with clarity. But it also means providing that support as a backup when they do show that initiative, just so they can understand a few things to avoid and a few problems to overcome without having to learn that the hard way. Let’s consider what can be done, below:
Talk About Your Own Experience
You’ve lived a life before you had children, and so it’s worth telling them what you’ve learned during that time, and of course, as a parent. This can help you bring your own perspective because while you are their parent, you’re also an adult who has most likely worked jobs before, been in education, and had to learn and relearn things anew. It might just be that you teach your child tips for staying safe when out at night in university or study tips that helped you secure good results. Don’t think your input is meaningless – it never is.
Help Them Engage With The Process
From attending university open days to scheduling an HBS admissions consultant, allowing your child to show the initiative regarding their next steps should be supported. This may just come in the form of simple conversations such as helping them balance the pros and cons of which universities to attend, all the way up to providing thorough assistance, such as letting them stay at home and save rent as they attend university at a local institution.
Solidifying The Basics
There are some lessons that can be fallen back on no matter where they find themselves in life. From teaching them how to properly clean their surroundings and take pride in their space, all the way up to help them learn how to properly cook so as to keep a dozen meals in rotation, as well as practical efforts like meal prep in advance, will help them avoid relying on takeout foods at university or when pulling an all-nighter studying. The more you can solidify the basics in that regard, the better they’ll be able to take care of themselves. Sure, part of this might just be for your own peace of mind, but when they move out, they’ll be better prepared also.
With this advice, we hope you can give your growing late-teenager every chance of success.
